The anti-perfect mom club

Early this morning at around 2 am, Kaleah woke up crying, frustrated that she couldn’t fall back to sleep.  I went into her room and told her to go back to bed.  A few minutes later she started crying again.  Frustrated my self, I went back telling her everything was okay and that she might wake up her brother and sister.  As I got back into bed I was a little unsettled.  I started thinking about the last 5 years of my daughter’s life, and for the first time I started to question how good of a mother I have been to her. 

I was a young when I had her, only 21, so many things I’ve done and am doing with Kiara and Dj I didn’t do for her.  I wasn’t able to nurse her for very long, only 2 1/2 months.  I was also still in college, so I didn’t get to stay home with her.  Tons of thoughts kept flooding in my mind, it actually made me cry. 

I kept going on and on, thinking of everything I didn’t do, wish I would have done, and should have done.  This went on until I finally became conscious enough to realize the beating I was giving myself.  Why do we as moms always beat ourselves up?  We should be thinking about all great things we have done and are going to do with our children on a daily bases. 

We live in a time where mothering our children is no longer good enough.  Instead we have to be the perfect mother.  The house has to be immaculate. The kids need to be smart and well behaved.  Our husbands should be well taken care of. Did I mention we must be climbing up the career ladder at the same time?

Perfection is an illusion that will never be attained. No matter how hard we try to be the perfect house wife, or mother we will always fall short. 

I now a member of the anti-perfect mom club.  Membership is free, all you have to do is love you children and husband. Members of the anti-perfect mom club realize that life isn’t perfect.  Life with small children usually strays from what is planned.  The anti-perfect mom gets dirty with their children, and makes breakfast for dinner.  She waits to clean up the house so that she can swim with the kids all day or take them to zoo.  In addition, she wants the best for her husband and does what she can to help him.  Most importantly the anti-perfect mom club is herself and doesn’t try to be anyone else!

Have a wonderful unperfect day!

Much Love, Reneca

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One Response

  1. I find it interesting that you have no comments yet, most likely because women are searching the seemingly perfect blogs and feeling inadequate because they don’t measure up. I want to give you kudos and a deep honoring for understanding what is truly important in life, and that is love. It really always comes down to love, and the funny thing is, when we truly love, our fear of others approval goes away because our focus is no longer on ourselves, it’s on others. Thank-you for giving me a boost tonight. I needed it.

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