I’m on my soap box!

With everything that has gone on in the past few months, I have definitely learned to appreciate the small things in life.  From the enthusiastic energy of a kindergarten-er who just learned to read (Yeah!!!), to the excitement of a toddler who is grasping at all life has to offer.  I have been able to reflect on my inner spirit and focus on staying present in every moment. To some we have hit rock bottom…to me we have been given an opportunity to ground ourselves and go back to what has provided us with such a sturdy foundation.  From here life has no bounds!

“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” Henry Ford

How true is that?!—Keeping a positive attitude and surrounding myself with people who radiate positivity has truly kept me going. 

The other night I was talking to a young woman –Hang on!-How old do I think I am?  I guess I should say a younger woman… So, anyways we were talking about her relationship and she made comment that she could never be dependent on a man like I am dependent on Duan….Wow, is that really how women feel these days. 

I couldn’t help myself, I hopped on my soap box, and this (in a nutshell) is what poured out.

First, I had to let it be known that I am not dependent on Duan.  He and I are in a partnership, not a dictatorship, which dependent implies.  We both agree that it is best for our children, especially in their early years to be at home rather than them being raised by someone else, especially when the only gain is monetary.  In this agreement, he is the one who is working and I stay at home with the kids.  We are willing to sacrifice materialistic things for the sake of our children. 

But make no mistake, I am completely capable of taking care of myself and my children if need be. I remember having the similar thoughts when I was 21. How could a woman give up her identity, her “power”, to give it all to a man?  In my infinite wisdom 🙂 at the ripe old age of 26, I have come to realize that it is more about entering into a partnership rather than a relationship were one is dominate over the other.  Let men be men. It is innate in them to lead, and provide for their family.  The last time I checked he couldn’t nurse a baby either so it is fitting that he goes work and I nurture, teach and create a home for our family. 

I have struggled with my own inner battle over being complete.  Give me a break!  Being a mother is hard work…why isn’t that enough?  On top of that I have to be an executive, just to feel like I am a whole woman?  Thankfully I have come to peace with myself and am proud to say to my peers (those with and without kids) that I am a MOM… that’s what I do.  I change diapers, nurse, wipe snotty noses, clean up lots of spills, kiss boo boos, hold and cuddle, teach, provide comfort, entertain, cook healthy and nutritious meals, and clean for three beautiful little beings, who live to make me happy!  How absolutely AWESOME is that?

 I am perfectly content on being where I am.  Some mothers feel comfortable juggling working out of the home… I say more power to you! Personally, I don’t think  there is not enough hours in the day to do the laundry, let alone, have a full time job. 

—Okay, it’s time for me to step off the soap box, bundle Kiara and DJ up, and go pick up Kaleah from school. Maybe we’ll go play in what’s left of the snow…What ever it is, I’ll love every moment of it!—

Much Love,



2 Responses

  1. Right on Sister!!! I totally agree 100% with everything you just said. Thanks for posting your thoughts.


  2. When the Teacher Becomes the Student

    With age does not always come wisdom. Moreover, experience is the best teacher of such issues. I had all these profound thoughts to say to you, but as I sit down to write, they all just seem so superfluous!

    All I need to say is thank you for being such a strong and uplifting woman!

    I am learning a lot from you!

    Hope to see you and the family soon!

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