Happiness

I want to first acknowledge the victims of 9/11. At some point today have a moment of silence not only for those who were directly affected; but also for our country which has gone through an enormous amount of change over the last 7 years.  No matter what your thoughts about who is ultimately responsible for that tragic day, it is still a day that has change the course of our country’s history. 

So before I get to the next quality, I have one question: How do you get your toddler to stop sucking her tounge?  I’m sure that sounds wierd, but Kiara sucks her tounge.  It drives Kaleah absolutely crazy.  Its not like a pacifier, or a finger where you can just take it out of her mouth.  Any suggestions are welcome!!!

Last week we talked about generosity.  I hope it dispelled the misconception that when you give anything you are being generous.  If it doesn’t benefit you as well it is not being generous.  This week lets talk about Happiness.

Quality 5: Happiness

Happiness is a state of well-being and contentment.

When you find the courage to live your life in harmony and balance, when you understand and practice generosity in the truest sense, happiness spontaneously appears. When you are happy, you are open and accessible. When you are happy, you tend to be more optimistic. You approach new challenges with a clear mind that seeks positive solutions. You see possibilities rather than problems.

Happiness is not a luxury. It is a necessity for true wealth. When you are happy, you have the satisfaction of knowing that your actions come from a place of purity and balance, that they are correct and generous and kind. There are no regrets in this state of happiness — and that’s a goal worth striving for in all areas of your life.

So lets all try to be happy!!!  LOL.   Have a great day!

Much love,  Reneca

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Attitude is everything!

How empowered would you feel if you knew that you have the ability to create each day?  I can hear the questions flooding in your head.  I can create each day?  What about fate?  What  about God? Aren’t we all living our destiny?  I too asked many of these same questions and more when I heard that I can and am in control of my life.  I have come to understand that this is true no matter if your Christian, Muslim, Buddhist or even Atheist.  It all boils down to one choice.  The choice to be happy.  With this one choice your life can change dramatically.

I know it sounds to simple to be true.  But think about it… What would it look like to be truly happy?  Would everything be perfect? Depending on your definition of perfect, life will never be without flaw.  However with the ups and down you are in control of one thing your attitude to each and every situation that you encounter.  You choose to be happy, sad, frustrated, mad, melancholy, and excited.  Many of us think that emotions are like automatic reactions to people and events. This is not true.

 Once you consciously decide to be happy the way you look at life shifts.  Instead of allowing circumstance to decide how you feel, you choose how it will affect you.  This is not to say you will never feel sad or unhappy. But I am saying that once you understand you control your emotions, you have power over your life. 

 For example, lets say your toddler is sleeping, and your preschooler is having quiet time.  You think everything is going well, so you pull out your book and relax.  About thirty minutes later you go in to check on your preschooler, to find her prancing around in your Minolo Blanikas sling backs. How cute, is first thought till you realize that she has cut off the straps!!!!  At this moment you have the power to choose how to feel and thus react to the situation.  You can be angry and yell at your 4 year old who only thought she did a great thing for mommy by making a new design for her shoes.  Or stop and think about the situation, first they are only shoes (I know they are expensive, but in reality they are just shoes), and second by being angry what outcome is that going to produce?  I use this example because it happened to me.  No I wasn’t happy in sense that I was grinning ear to ear, but I wasn’t angry either. In this instance I chose not to react in a negative way.  Believe me there was a consequence for her action.  She sat in time out and wasn’t able to play with her ponies (her favorite toy).  Since I didn’t react out of anger I was able to explain to why that wasn’t okay.  She learned a lesson, and it wasn’t don’t cut someones shoes because they’ll get mad and yell at you. 

Nobody will ever say they want to be unhappy, but when you choose be positive, positive things will come back to you.  Its the law of attraction.  Of course this will not happen overnight, but with practice you find that you will react in a more positive manor which will produce a more positive outcome. 

How do you start?  First, like anything else it starts with a choice. You must choose to be happy!  Make the decision to keep your life positive.  By looking at the positive side in each situation, life will begin to seem less chaotic.  Remember that attitude is everything. With happiness you will find the one thing we are all searching for… peace. 

Much love, Reneca

“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.” Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

Dance like no one is watching!

Yesterday after Journey woke up from her nap I turned on the R&B Hits on the cable station. It played I guess what we would call now “old school” , but really the jams I would listen to like 10 years ago. I was singing along and dancing and Journey and Faith loved it. I realized how happy the nostalgia of the music made me. Faith “danced”; she bounces, and moves her arms, and sometimes twirls in a circle! We had a good time shakin our booties.

The reason why this had such an impact on me is because I have hard days with the girls; crying and whining had made me a little grumpy at times. So, getting this long weekend to just relax and enjoy ourselves helped a lot. Putting on some music and letting go and being present with my family was fun.

“Work like you don’t need money,
Love like you’ve never been hurt,
And dance like no one’s watching.”

I was looking up the quote that went with my title and I found this webpage that just spoke to me, so I wanted to share it with you. This is so real and touched me so much. I have been reading the Power of Now (still not finished), but this really sums up the book and the idea to me. It is what I want to be every moment. This is what I’m working on this week; to be in the moment and present with all I come in contact with, to let loose and enjoy life, to be spontaneous because this is my only life, to tell anyone that I love–that I love them and to work hard now on my business ventures. That is the only way to true happiness in our lives and ourselves. Yesterday is history…tomorrow is a mystery…today is a Gift that is why we call it the Present. Have a good week! Love, Kalisha

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another.

Then we are frustrated that the kids aren’t old enough
and we’ll be more content when they are.

After that we’re frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage.

We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.

The truth is, there’s no better time to be happy than right now.

If not now … when?

Your life will always be filled with challenges. It’s best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway.

One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza …

“For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin.
But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”

This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.

So, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time … and remember that time waits for no one …

So stop waiting until you finish school … until you go back to school … until you lose ten pounds … until you gain ten pounds … until you have kids … until your kids leave the house … until you start work … until you retire … until you get married … until you get divorced … until Friday night … until Sunday morning … until you get a new car or home … until your car or home is paid off … until spring, until summer … until fall … until winter … until you are off welfare … until the first or fifteenth … until your song comes on … until you’ve had a drink … until you’ve sobered up … until you die … until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy …

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