I’m on my soap box!

With everything that has gone on in the past few months, I have definitely learned to appreciate the small things in life.  From the enthusiastic energy of a kindergarten-er who just learned to read (Yeah!!!), to the excitement of a toddler who is grasping at all life has to offer.  I have been able to reflect on my inner spirit and focus on staying present in every moment. To some we have hit rock bottom…to me we have been given an opportunity to ground ourselves and go back to what has provided us with such a sturdy foundation.  From here life has no bounds!

“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” Henry Ford

How true is that?!—Keeping a positive attitude and surrounding myself with people who radiate positivity has truly kept me going. 

The other night I was talking to a young woman –Hang on!-How old do I think I am?  I guess I should say a younger woman… So, anyways we were talking about her relationship and she made comment that she could never be dependent on a man like I am dependent on Duan….Wow, is that really how women feel these days. 

I couldn’t help myself, I hopped on my soap box, and this (in a nutshell) is what poured out.

First, I had to let it be known that I am not dependent on Duan.  He and I are in a partnership, not a dictatorship, which dependent implies.  We both agree that it is best for our children, especially in their early years to be at home rather than them being raised by someone else, especially when the only gain is monetary.  In this agreement, he is the one who is working and I stay at home with the kids.  We are willing to sacrifice materialistic things for the sake of our children. 

But make no mistake, I am completely capable of taking care of myself and my children if need be. I remember having the similar thoughts when I was 21. How could a woman give up her identity, her “power”, to give it all to a man?  In my infinite wisdom 🙂 at the ripe old age of 26, I have come to realize that it is more about entering into a partnership rather than a relationship were one is dominate over the other.  Let men be men. It is innate in them to lead, and provide for their family.  The last time I checked he couldn’t nurse a baby either so it is fitting that he goes work and I nurture, teach and create a home for our family. 

I have struggled with my own inner battle over being complete.  Give me a break!  Being a mother is hard work…why isn’t that enough?  On top of that I have to be an executive, just to feel like I am a whole woman?  Thankfully I have come to peace with myself and am proud to say to my peers (those with and without kids) that I am a MOM… that’s what I do.  I change diapers, nurse, wipe snotty noses, clean up lots of spills, kiss boo boos, hold and cuddle, teach, provide comfort, entertain, cook healthy and nutritious meals, and clean for three beautiful little beings, who live to make me happy!  How absolutely AWESOME is that?

 I am perfectly content on being where I am.  Some mothers feel comfortable juggling working out of the home… I say more power to you! Personally, I don’t think  there is not enough hours in the day to do the laundry, let alone, have a full time job. 

—Okay, it’s time for me to step off the soap box, bundle Kiara and DJ up, and go pick up Kaleah from school. Maybe we’ll go play in what’s left of the snow…What ever it is, I’ll love every moment of it!—

Much Love,

Reneca

Lounge tip #25

We hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! If you were in the kitchen all day on Thursday or if you were hitting the sales yesterday at the mall, today is a great day to just sit and enjoy family.  In any case here are some great stories that you and your little ones can read.  The are all centered around the Thanksgiving holiday and being thankful.

Louisa May Alcott, An Old-Fashioned Thanksgiving.
  The seven rambunctious Basset children decide to cook their own Thanksgiving dinner after their parents leave to tend to a sick grandmother.  Minor catastrophes and understandable chaos add to the charm of this rediscovered family classic. It is sentimental and perfect for the holiday.

Eve Bunting, How Many Days to America: A Thanksgiving Story,
The story of contemporary pilgrims leaving what is familiar with some of the same fears and hardships the early pilgrims faced.  Ages 4-8

Barbara Cohen, Molly’s Pilgrim
A young Jewish immigrant tells her friends the story of Thanksgiving, and they learn that it takes all kinds of pilgrims to make Thanksgiving. Ages 5-10

Joy Cowley, Gracias: The Thanksgiving Turkey
Joy Cowley’s Thanksgiving picture book is illustrated with colorful oil paintings by Joe Cepeda. A young Hispanic boy, Miquel, lives with his grandparents in a city apartment. His father sends him a turkey to fatten up for the holiday. Instead, the bird becomes Miquel’s pet. Its life is spared when it is unexpectedly blessed by the priest. Gracias The Thanksgiving Turkey is an engaging story that will appeal to four- to eight-year-olds.

Alice Dalgleish, The Thanksgiving Story

James Daugherty, The Landing of the Pilgrims
The story told by a Newbery medal author. Ages 9-12

Barbara Greenwood, A Pioneer Story A Pioneer Thanksgiving :A Story of Harvest Celebrations in 1841
A weaving together of stories, information, and activities to create a tapestry of pioneer life.  Wonderful illustrations, great family book.  All ages.

Helen Haidle, Thank You, Dear God!
A board book for little children about things to be thankful for.

B.G. Hennesy, One Little, Two Little, Three Little Pilgrims
A thanksgiving book for two- and three-year-olds.

Anna Kamma, If Your Were at the First Thanksgiving,
The historical details of the first Thanksgiving in Plymouth.

Verla Kay, tattered Sails
A pilgrim family journeys across the ocean and comes to freedom in America.

Patricia Lakin,  Fat Chance Thanksgiving
A lonely girl, newcomer to a housing project, decides to get everyone in the building together for Thanksgiving; getting to the heart of thankfulness.

Julian Scheer, A Thanksgiving Turkey
Gorgeous illustrations in a story about a boy and his grandfather who hope to shoot a wild turkey in the woods, and then deliberately miss the shot.  A wonderfully tender story about youth and old age.

Chief Jake Swamp, Giving Thanks: A Native American Good Morning Message
According to the author, Chief Jake Swamp, the text of this picture book is “based on the Thanksgiving Address, an ancient message of peace and appreciation of Mother Earth and all her inhabitants” that comes from the Iroquois. The striking illustrations, acrylic paintings on canvas by Erwin Printup, Jr., capture the beauty of nature with drama and simplicity and complement the message of Giving Thanks: A Native American Good Morning Message This is another book the entire family will appreciate.

 

Enjoy these books around a fire or on the beach.  Wherever you are, appriciate what you have and give thanks!  Explain to your children about being thankful, help them realize that there is more to be thankful for than their favorite toys.  (Siblings, food, shelter, clean water ect.)

Have a great day!

 

Reneca and Kalisha

Lounge tip #24

Women often hide behind their hair.  Whether it’s short or long, curly or straight, having a good hair day can make us feel our best.  Here are a few homemade conditioners that will help keep your hair feeling soft and smooth.

HOME-MADE HAIR CONDITIONERS

Avocado & Egg Yolk
Mash a small avocado and combine with an egg yolk. Apply to hair for 15 minutes, then rinse and wash your hair as usual. This is a great moisturizing mask for your hair.

Yogurt Hair Mask
Beat 1 egg white until foamy. Add to 6 tablespoons plain natural yogurt. Apply to hair in small sections at a time. Leave in for 15 minutes. Rinse.

Sunflower & Wheatgerm Oil
Mix 1 cup of sunflower oil and 1 cup of wheat germ oil. Warm the mixture and massage it on the head and hair. Wash off with lukewarm water in which one tablespoon of lemon juice has been added.

Mayonnaise Conditioner
Apply 1/2 cup of mayonnaise to damp hair. Work into hair and then cover with a shower cap or towel for up to 20 minutes. Rinse thoroughly and then shampoo as usual.

Mi Vida Loca! TT #4

Written by: Reneca

We had a rough day today (which is why I’m posting this so late).  It was truly one of those days when you want to cry, pull your hair out, and roll over laughing.  Such an emotional roller coaster has phening for my soft comfy bed! Any who, this is a short list of what we did today.

1.  The day started at 4 am exactly.  I get a phone call from my brother.  I can’t help but think, he must need us to come pick him up after partying to hard.  To my surprise, he isn’t on the other end. It is another man.

“Is this Reneca?”
“Yes.”
“Can you please tell me the relation you have with Damion?”
“He’s my brother.”
“Well, he has been in an automobile accident…”

Of course my heart drops. I’m stunned.  So I pop up, wake Duan up and jump in the car.  Mind you, DJ wakes up and is crying, its about 20 degrees out side and drizzling (I have to first scrape the windows) and I forgot to put my bra on.

When I get to the hospital I find out he is okay, concusion, and a strained neck. Sigh of relief!  Things could have been much worse. 

     2. We get home in just enough time for me to do Kaleah’s hair (thank God, that would have been a disaster, but funny, if Duan had to do it).  So I scramble to make sure she has everything for her day, and Duan takes her to school.

     3.  I get to go to sleep.  But only for about an hour.  I had such a busy day planned I couldn’t sleep long. 

     4.  After my short nap, I got DJ and Kiara dressed, and made grilled cheese and turkey sandwiches to go. (I managed to wash up somewhere in there)

     5.  Off to pick up Kaleah.  Thankfully another mom watches the kids in the car so it wouldn’t take me 5 minutes just to pull them out. 

     6.  Gave the kids their lunch, so they could eat as we went to the Girl Scout store to pick up a few more things for Kaleah’s Daisy meeting at 3:30.

     7.  Tried to find the humor, patience and innocence in the kids taking out every single stuffed animal the Girl Scout store had while I searched for her Daisy pin. (Its a good thing that the Girl Scouts is ran with such great values, other wise they would of kicked us out.)

    8.  Finally we touched back down at the house. I put Kiara down for her nap and tried to do the same for DJ, but he popped right back up as soon as his head hit the bed. So instead of compounding my already aching head with his whaling, I let him play.

   9.  It’s 2:40 pm and I’m running around like crazy woman in a white padded room; rushing to get every thing packed for the meeting.

  10.  Found out DJ put a domino in the printer, so the parent letter wouldn’t print.

  11.  Kaleah and I get to the school at 3:30 pm ( the time the meeting is supposed to start). Oh did I mention, I’m her leader?!  What a perfect first meeting with the leader late.

  12.  Have you ever been in a room with 5 kindergardeners, right after school, who are hungery, tired, and restless from sitting around at school.  Sounds like a blast, doesn’t it.  We actually did have a really great meeting.  Made our snack box, and talked about healthy snacks. 

  13.  After homework, dinner, and bed time stories, I am here writting this post.  As I’ve read over it, I have come to a few conclusions:

• Life is precious, so no matter if you are having a bad day, at least you are alive to have it!
• Kids are innocent.  They can have fun any where.
• I love my husband.  He continuoulsy called to check in with me through out the day just to give words of encouragement.
• At the end of the day, all you can do is stay in the moment and enjoy life. Good or bad  it is what you make of it.

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others’ comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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How to Lounge: Tip # 23

At least once a week we should set time aside to do something special for ourselves. Whether it be to crochet or knit , journal , or to give ourself a manicure, this time can alleviate stress, and get you grounded again.  Instead of pampering our bodies lets pamper our inner spirit today. 

Every thing you say to yourself, positive or negative is an affirmation. These thoughts are essentially a reflection of truths you feel about yourself. The great thing about it is that we have the ability to change these truths.  By creating positive affirmations, which are just short positive statements, you will test negative beliefs and replace them with positive ones.

How to create your own affirmations

Creating your own affirmations is easy. Think about the areas in your life that you have issues with.  Maybe its how you parent your children, for example.  Here are a few simple affirmations 

“I am a great parent”

“I parent with confidence”

Other affirmation topics are:

 

	Health and Healing
	Abundance
	Love
	Romance
	Weightloss
	Self Esteem
	Peace & Harmony
	Joy & Happiness

 

If you are having trouble thinking of positive affirmations for yourself here are a few websites that have examples of ones you can use. 
Vital Affirmations
The Salem New Age Center
Coping.org *
There are countless others, just Google affirmation.

How do you use the affirmations?

There are multiple ways you can use your affirmations. 

•  Write them on index card and post them all over the house, in your car, in your wallet, diaper bag,  
•  Chant or sing them throughout the day. ( I know this sounds weird, but if it works for you go for it!)
• Record them and listen to them periodically during the day.

We hope these pointers help you in your day to day life. Live an abundant life!

Reneca and Kalisha

Kiara’s flour face!

Written by: Reneca

We are a FINALIST in the Prego Fun with Food Contest!

GO and VOTE for Reneca and lil’ flour face Kiara at 5min4mom!!!

Thanks! Hope she wins! Mama needs some groceries! Mmmm….

This is Kiara (2 1/2) helping mommy make tortillas.  I’m entering this photo into the Prego Fun with Food Photo Contest hosted by 5min4mom.

Kiara loves to help mommy cook everything, especially when we get to mix with our hands.  This is her kneading the dough for tortillas. She looks like Spun Mackenzie with a ring of flour around her eye.  By the time we were finished with the tortillas flour was every where, counter, floors, her clothes, and me!  Having her help in the kitchen has done several things. 

1. It keeps her entertained.
2. She has learned about measuring and knows the ingredients to several recipes.
3. Since she has invested time in cooking, She is very eager to taste her creations!

Moments like this are priceless.

Thirteen questions

Written by: Reneca

Thirteen things you may or may-not know about me. The questions are finally answered.

1. I was born on the Capricorn-Aquarius cusp.  Which may explain the crazy duality of my personality.
2. I have 3 brothers.  Two are older and live in California.  My baby brother lives with us (okay so he’s not a baby, he’s 23 his pic is below).
3. I love the color purple.  The actual color, but the movie is great also!
4. Cooking is so much fun.  I could spend hours in the kitchen.  It would be great to have a nice spacious kitchen, where the kids and I could cook all day long.
5. I was born in Denver. But I was raised in Aurora.
6. I’ve gone to three different colleges.  I first went to the Citadel, a military college in South Carolina, with a full ride volleyball scholarship.  (I had to cut all my hair off…it was short, like almost buzz cut).  Then I went to Colorado State, where I met Kalisha in Corbet and Duan at a party.  After I got had Kaleah, I transferred to CU Denver, where I graduated with my BA in Psychology.
7. I want more kids.  To many of you that may sound crazy, but its true.  I love children!  While I may not have anymore, adoption is never out of the question. A family of 7 or 8 sounds great!!
8. Call me Gertrude (Duan does), but I find knitting very relaxing.  I’ve taught my self and although I’m not very good at it yet, it helps me find some peace in all the chaos.
9. People always think I’m about 10 years younger than I am.  I’m learning to appreciate this, but I gets a little annoying to be carded to go to a rated R movie, and most recently the mall!  I’m 26! (You can only imagine the looks I get when I’m toting all three munchkins with me)
10. Spring is my favorite season.  Everything is coming alive.  Plants are turning green, flowers are blooming, and its not (usually) snowing and its not an inferno.  It’s perfect for going to the park every day!
11. My parents live in Ethiopia.  My dad has been contracted out there for 2 years.  So he and my mom are living it up on a small compound in Addis Ababa.  Their culture  is so interesting. I can’t wait to go visit.
12. Unfortunately my kids are all C-section babies.  Kaleah was an emergency, and the other two were just repeats.  I wish I knew what I do now, but that’s the name of the game,  you live you learn.
13. I need SLEEP!  With DJ still waking up at least once a night, and the girls climbing in the bed with us, I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a full nights rest. 

Hope you have a great day. 

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others’ comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Anything is possible, be thankful! TT#3

Written by:  Reneca

I’m having one of those ” Oh S#!$” moments.  Scratch that…I am having one of those awwhhha moments!  Life has thrown our family a curve ball and now as we step up to the plate I am prepared to hit that damn ball out of the park.  Last friday Duan’sschool shut down.  I could easily go through the rest of this post ranting and raving about who’s fault it was, and who’s it wasn’t.  But honestly, what’s the point.  Everyone played a role, and I’m not a delusional wife who thinks her husband can do no wrong.  I do know if I were to stay in a place of blame, and negativity nothing positive would come of it. 

Buddha said,  “The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”  As far as I’m concerned, there is nothing else to do.  When we stay in the moment our pasts fade away.  The uncertainty of tomorrow doesn’t exist.  Instead, an infinite assortment of possiblities arise.  This is not to suggest that planning is not essential.

Infact, Kalisha I will say time and time again when you fail to plan, you plan to fail.  Planning may be the most integral part of the equation.  It’s not however, what you plan, but how.  When you are planning, especially when it comes to major situations in your life, it should made when you are at peace.  You may not be happy with the situation but until you have gotten to the point of acceptance, the choices you make have the potential to be erratic, and based completely off of emotion.

The question that follows is: How do you get to a place emotionally and spiritually to make those planning decisions?  This question, of course has so many answers.  The answer differs from person to person.  Some people may need to pray prior to making their decisions, while other may need to meditate. It takes a lot of discipline to step out of the situation, and stay in the moment to purposefully make these choices.  (This includes when you are planning your day. ) This is what  I am putting into practice.   

With all that being said, I am staying focus only on the true blessings that are all around me.  Here are thirteen of the many things in my life that I am thankful for. (In no particular order)

1. My Children:   They bring me so much joy!  I am constantly reminded of how blessed I am every time I see them.  It’s amazing to watch how they are growing physically, mentally and spiritually.   And they are so funny.  In an instant they can make me extremely upset, and at the same time hardly able to contain my laughter.
2. My husband:  Isn’t it great to know you will be with your best friend forever?!!!!   He truly is my friend, my confidant, my inspiration.  Regardless of our material struggles, our relationship is built on such a strong foundation that nothing can shake it. 
3. My best friend:  You are truly blessed when you have a friend which has become more like a sister.  Kalisha, has been there to support me without judgement.  What more can you ask for?
4. My Family:   The continual support and encouragement  from my parents, brother, and Cousins. 
5. My extended family: I have been welcomed and loved into the Ruff family. I really feel like I have have another brother, a sister, two more parents, and a slew of Aunts, Uncles and Cousins.  Not many people can can say this about their in-laws.
6. My health:   I’m alive, breathing, and thriving, with no ailments.  When you step back and realize that some people can’t walk, talk or even breath by themselves, life in it self is a blessing.
7. I’m grateful for living in a country where I have a voice.  There are so many woman throughout the world who cannot vote, who cannot drive, and in some instances cannot even speak. 
8. I was watching a show the other night, and a woman’s parents had recently passed.  No matter how much we disagree, argue or fight, I am so glad my parents are still alive.
9. Regardless of politics, partisinism, or beliefs, it’s incredible to be in this dispensation of time, when a black man can be elected President of the United States.  I know my generation cannot even fathom the enormity of this event, but it does show that with hard work and perseverance, anybody can be what they want to be. (No matter, what , ethnicity!)
10. I am so glad that someone cared enough to teach me to read.  Okay, that may seem like a stretch, but there are so many children who are not given the same opportunity.  Think of the things you couldn’t do if you weren’t able to read!  I know one thing, you wouldn’t be reading this post!
11. It is so wonderful to have the ability to start over.  At any moment we can decide to start anew.  We are not fixed to one outcome.  If we don’t like our situation, ultimately we have the power to change it. 
12. I just bought $50 dollars of groceries for only $19!!!  Saving that kind of money is always something to be grateful for!
13. You:  Okay so I don’t know many of you, but I am thankful you took the time come check out the crazy ramblings of my mind!  So, thanks!

I want to leave you with one more quote.

Behind me is infinite power,

before me is endless possibility.

Around me is boundless opportunity.

Why should I fear?

Author unknown

 Check out the other TT’s!

Much Love,  Reneca

 

 

Lounge Tip #21: Indulge yourself

“By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class.”
— Anne Morrow Lindbergh

This is so true!  Motherhood is a 24/7 job.  We work the normal forty hour week and then an additional 58 hours in overtime,  not including the on call hours during the night. And while most of us would never think of turning in our official mom card, we would like to get away from it all (even if its just for a few minutes).

  A lot of you were out last night Trick-O-Treating with your little ghouls and gobblins and are starting to regret it now that you have tons of candy that they will be begging for.  Well we have one way that you can use some of the candy and indulge yourself at the same time.

Delux Chocolate Bar Creame

• 3 mini size chocolate bars of your choice
• 1/4 cup heavy cream
• 1 cup of milk
• whip cream (optional  necessary)
• cream liqueur (kaluah, Baily’s or your favorite)

Put chocolate bars, cream, and milk in a large sauce pan. Stir continuously. Pour into your favorite mug, add your choice of liqueur. Top with a dolup of whip cream.

Of course you can enjoy this with out the liqueur.  The key is that you fully enjoy this drink.  Curl up on the couch with a cozy throw and a book.  (This might be a good moment to let your kids watch their favorite movie!) You may need to make more hot chocolate for your munchkins, just don’t add the liqueur, LOL!

Menu Plan Mondays

Written by: Reneca

 

This my first time posting up a menu for Menu Monday’s.  I don’t know why it took me so long to do it, but I guess all that matters is that I’m doing it now.  Every week I clip coupons and make a menu plan for the entire week (breakfast, lunch and dinner including snacks).  This week I can spend more time making the meals during the day since Kaleah is on fall break!

*Also DJ’s 1st Birthday is on Saturday…. my little baby, he is getting so big.

This week this is what we’ll be enjoying.

 Breakfast

Monday: Banana pancakes topped with peach preserves

Tuesday: Scrambled eggs with spinach, toast, orange slices

Wednesday:Mixed berry smoothie, mini bagel with sunflower seed butter (Kiara is allergic to peanut butter)

Thursday:Oatmeal with raisins, toast

Friday:egg nests (hollowed piece of toast with a fried egg cooked in the center) with fruit of choice

Saturday:Swedish pancakes (DJ’s favorite)

Sunday: French toast, bacon, strawberries

Lunch

Monday: Sun flower seed butter and jelly sandwiches, and carrot sticks

Tuesday:Grilled cheese and tomato soup

Wednesday:Turkey and cheese wrap

Thursday: Tarryaki chicken salad with pineapple in celery sticks

Friday: Dem Bones

Saturday:Hummus, flat bread, and cucumbers

Sunday:Fried egg sandwiches, and fruit

Dinner

Monday:   Meatball subs (with veggies hidden inside), with homemade bread

Tuesday: Apple, sausage and sweet potato casserole

Wednesday: Terryaki Chicken, Chinese Veggies and Udon Noodles

Thursday: Leftover Buffet

Friday: Haunted Taco Tarts

Saturday: Create Your own Pizza’s and Birthday cake for DJ (1st B-day!!!)

Sunday: Green Chile (Chicken), homemade tortillas, and re-fried beans

To check out what else is cooking this week check out Menu Plan Monday at I’m an Organizing Junkie